21 Days - No Orgasms!

Today we had a couples session with our coach and discussed a lot of things.  The biggest point of discussion was how i would be entering a total of 21 days without an orgasm.  Along the way i would be gauging how things are going and sending results to M.  She in turn will work with Syd on maximizing the effect of my orgasms.  The idea of not having an orgasm for 21 days is very scary.  Given then that up until 4 months ago, i basically had orgasms on demand, via masturbation, but it was on demand.  While it is scary, it does seem like Syd wants this and we are clarifying this in discussions.

  

Up till now Syd has generally said that she wants this but it was because i introduced it that she wants it, she didn’t even know about it before.  We talked about this and i said i think it is important for her to want it regardless of whether i want it, and for me to want it regardless of whether she wants it, and then, only then, can we both want this for us.  Obviously, if i know Syd wants this, i want it.  If she knows i want this then she wants this.  It seems pretty clear then that we both want this but i think that may be difficult for Syd to admit at times.

So, i am in day 4 of 21 of my non-orgasm state.  i know i have a huge pit in my stomach for a lot of reasons.  Obvious it is that i am looking at the next 17 days without orgasms when i was hoping today to orgasm with Syd.  Also, a lot of other thoughts creep into my mind like Syd having sex with other guys - lovers - and that leaves a bigger pit.  Now, i know this is what i wanted, and it is what i want for her, it’s just difficult going through it in reality sometimes.  if i ever thought this was just some role playing fun game, i kind of know we are entering a very real and planned out stage.  i hope it continues to be fun.