My New Friend

i am sitting here this morning while Syd is texting a bull.  We have been with him already so i know him.  There is nothing easy about sitting and waiting so i choose to try and busy my mind.  i am finding the most difficult issue for me so far is giving up control, letting go.  It gives me a pit in my stomach not knowing what is happening.  i suspect that this “pit” and i will have to become friends.   

In the past, i would have suspected the worst.  Now, in this new found place, it is a little better, i trust Syd and know she loves me and would never do anything to hurt me.  When i focus on that, i can feel my breathing ease and body begin to relax.